If I win I praise You, If I lose I praise You

            If I win I praise You, If I lose I praise You

           

            Living alone is a hard time for me. I have been living just by myself since I was twelve years. I still remember how hard it was and how every day, every week I always look the calendar to see whether if I have a holiday to come back home.

Every evening was the very lonely for me. I missed my parents so much, if I can back in time I think I will never take this chance. I think I won’t go away from my parents.  I cried every evening then I try to make myself fell better by singing a song, speaking alone and praying, I really miss my parents Lord.

        Almost eleven years has passed away, so much thing happen to me, happiness and sorrow. I face it alone. I am not a kind of woman that telling the other about my life even to my parents. If everything get hard for me I will just face it and try to make it better, and if I can’t handle it I just let it go.

        If I can live my life I think it is a grace from God. In every sorrow I can survive it is because God cares my life so much. Now I am waiting for something in my life. I really put my trust in God and sure that I will get it.

But as a human there is  a question in my heart, how if I don’t get it? If I get it I will thankful to God, but if I don’t get it, whether I can thankful to God?

Of course I want in every condition I can praise Lord in my life. I have learning about praising Him unconditionally but that is my human being.